When your body does its thing
Mental Wealth Workshop! Wednesday 8th May 7 pm BST Zoom link below.
Apologies Coffee with Coops is late. I was rushed to the hospital late Friday afternoon. I should have called the NHS 111 emergency line at 2 am Friday when I was having intense crippling spasms in my pelvis. But I was raised by a Nurse/Midwife – to give context I once went to school with broken fingers from trampolining club because Mum said A&E would only strap them together. After a few hours at school trying to do woodwork, my teacher called Mum to tell her to take me to A&E. They did strap them together ha. I’ve been nurtured to deal with a high pain threshold and a stoic mentality.
By Friday afternoon I couldn’t walk or breathe as the pain was taking my breath away. I was doubled over in agony. I went to the Pharmacy near my home, I asked if I could speak to the pharmacist quickly, and less than three minutes later he told me to call my doctor. I called 111 who said I needed to be at the local hospital within an hour, I wasn’t allowed to drive and if I couldn’t get a lift, to call an ambulance. They said I would be seen within an hour due to the risks. Looking back now I took all of this in my stride. I called for a cab, and it arrived five minutes later.
It turns out I have an inflamed bladder and I would not have known what this felt like. I was seen very quickly in the hospital and the staff were lovely. I felt dizzy in the waiting room, sitting alone, wanting to curl up and the pain to go. There was a funny moment when a lady took her mobile call, and the ringtone was the theme tune to the hospital drama Casualty. I mean did she change it before she left home?! I laughed out loud at this. I made friends with a lovely family, as I lent the dad my phone charger – I picked up my work bag to take to the hospital, a habit. I thought the hospital staff had called my name, they called for Ibrahim and the son laughed at me for this. They didn’t speak good English but asked me my name and said they would keep an ear out and look after me.
It turns out it’s my hormones that have triggered this inflammation. From when I was a baby to a small child, I was on antibiotics for years because my kidneys and urinary tract didn’t work properly. I spent a lot of time in the hospital as a child, I have a fuzzy memory of being in a bed with lots of student doctors staring down at me. The doctor said as I get older, meaning perimenopause, and a woman in her mid-40s, this is likely an area which will flare up for me with the scar tissue on my bladder wall - note I need to start researching this when I’m well. He prescribed me strong antibiotics and pain relief. Emma my lovely friend came to pick me up with her partner, she made me laugh which also hurt my tummy.
At the weekend I was going to remind you about the Substack workshop I am hosting on Wednesday at 7 pm BST. As I’m on the mend, this will go ahead. The topic is Movement: Moving more for our Mental Wealth which is the theme for the UK’s Mental Health Awareness Week w/c the 13th of May.
The Zoom link is below to register. It is a webinar so you won’t be on camera and will last under 45 minutes.
https://us02web.zoom.us/webinar/register/7017122515852/WN_jrh3OB3FQMmqQfAGMVgGhA
My paid subscribers will receive the perks of a special weekday planner for My Mental Wealth™ and a short coaching video from me.
What I’ve been reminded of this weekend is when our ‘bodies are bodying’ I am not sure that’s a real word, it is often out of our control. Physical sickness, illness, or chronic conditions mean we must listen and meet our body where it is. We know mental health and physical health are inextricably linked. Being alone, I’ve had to double down on the positive mental stuff even when I’ve not felt like it.
I had a good cry that I had to miss a fabulous writing retreat I was meant to be at today, I said to my Mum on the phone I hate being sick on my own that has been awful. I had to wash and dry my sheets twice yesterday. But the tools I’ve used since Saturday; are gratitude, listening to meditations, doing breathwork to ease the pain spasms, and journaling. They all work because I try and do them all the time. I know this will not heal my bladder, but it will make me kinder to myself. I have given my body self-forgiveness and am proud of what it does for me all the other times when I’m not sick and I can move. Last night I kept repeating out loud how proud I was of myself. You might think it’s ridiculous, but it is harder for us to make those positive connections in our brain, it loves the negative. We have to believe it. I have gone out of my way to do this, but if you ask me how my mental health is right now it is much higher on the continuum than my physical health.
I hope you have had a lovely Bank Holiday weekend in the UK. If not I am sorry and I know that sucks.
Please do come on Wednesday, it would be great to see some familiar names pop up. Please jump on, have some fun and keep me company. I am sure there will be some learnings for you about Mental Wealth and movement.
Love Coops x